Sharing my experiences as a mother of three-year-old twin girls to show how dominating the effect of social conditioning is on us and how difficult it is to eliminate it as it is so unconscious. I want to drive home the point that women (or any oppressed group) do have an uphill task to fight against their own and everyone else's conditioning to break the stereotype. This also shows how skewed a lot of our available art and literature is in terms of gendered roles:
1. While narrating a very innocent story to my kids about a mother leaving her daughter at home for work, I had to narrate a scene where the child's grand-dad fries papads for lunch. And my daughter's very innocent question with the look of surprise on her face is enough to say it all - "Do grandpas fry papads?" She hasn't seen men cook and the implication of that hit me hard. Equality begins at home, and it cannot be emphasized enough. Gendered roles in parenting are unhealthy and damaging for children.
On an aside, I totally recommend the above-referenced book called 'When will amma be back?' for parents looking to break gender stereotypes for their children. It is very affordable and available in India and you can read the e-copy here - link.
2. I was narrating another story to my little girls about a baby tiger going on an adventure trip with daddy, having a lot of fun along the way. This story had a male protagonist (it is so easy to imagine daddy-son bonding over adventure trip in our literature right?). They were unwilling to accept it - They corrected me half-way through saying 'No baby Tigo is a girl. Daddy tiger is a boy. You are saying it all wrong mamma!' It was important for them to see themselves in that light, on that trip having fun with daddy.
In the real world which constantly imposes these stereotypes on us, how difficult is it for little girls to grow up into bold and confident women who are not afraid to go after anything they want? How do we give them the validation that they can choose who they want to be? Our children don't deserve this! It is our responsibility to break the stereotypes to make the world a fair place.
Related posts:
1. Engaging your toddlers at home - link
2. From my mommy experience: Infant & toddler reading - I - link
3. A moment of gratitude and empathy: Celebrating the spirit of women's day - link
4. Bridging the gap: Let's acknowledge Privileges to accomplish Equality - link
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